Sunday, 17 June 2012

  • You do what you want 'cause I'm not what you wanted...

    Well, I spoke to Ryan for the first time in two weeks the other day. He told me that everything we had was a lie and that he never actually liked me. He then went on to list all the things about me that bothered him. Basically I was a waste of his time. So... Needless to say that made me feel absolutely worthless and brought my trust level all the way back down to nonexistent. I promise this is my last post where I mention him because I am done. I'm done feeling like crap, I'm done wasting my time on someone who apparently never gave a shit about me, I'm done thinking I need someone else to make me happy. I'M DONE. 

    I would just like to thank everyone though who has messaged me or who has left a comment regarding this whole Ryan thing. It amazes me how many people out there care and take the time to give advice, love, etc. Honestly, I wouldn't have been able to make it through this without all of you... You're the best!

     

    Here's to new beginnings... Enjoy the post! 

     

     

    If something bad happened, you could look at it as failure, or you could look at it as a chance to head in another direction.

     

     

    I don’t understand how you can let go of something you once said you couldn’t live without. How pictures can never change but the people in them do. How forever turns into a few short months that you’d do almost anything to get back. How even though you know something is the best for you, it just hurts the same. How the people who once wanted to spend every second with you, think a few minutes of their time is too much to spare. How people make promises despite knowing how common it is for promises to be broken. How people can erase you from their lives just because it’s easier than working things out.

     

     

    With every day coming and going, I'm learning how to be okay without you. And I can't wait for the day when I get to look at you and feel absolutely nothing.

     

     

     

    We're not a very patient society, so I think that maybe people get into relationships, and if they're not exactly the way they want them to be and there's no quick fix, they just give up. 

    -Paper Heart

     

     

    Someday, we’ll forget the hurt, the reason we cried and who caused us pain. We will finally realize that the secret of being free is not revenge, but letting things unfold in their own way and own time. After all, what matters is not the first, but the last chapter of our life which shows how well we ran the race. So smile, laugh, forgive, believe and love all over again.

     

     

    Life was messy. Always had been and always would be and that was just the way it was, so why bother complaining? You either did something about it or you didn’t, and then you lived with the choice you made.

    -Evelyn Collier

     

     

    The best revenge you could give someone who broke your heart, is to just let them see that youre happy without them.



     

    That was the thing; you never got used to it, the idea of someone being gone. Just when you think it is reconciled, accepted, someone points it out to you, and it just hits you all over again, that shocking. 


     

    For one split second, she almost turned around, but that would be like pouring raindrops back into a cloud. So, she took another step and said "I see the way out, and I'm gonna take it."

     


    Real life is a funny thing you know. In real life saying the right thing, at the right moment is beyond crucial. So crucial in fact, that most of us start to hesitate, for fear of saying the wrong thing at the wrong time. But lately what I’ve began to fear more than that, is letting the moment pass with saying anything. I think you deserved to look back on your life without this chorus of resounding voices saying, I could of but it’s too late now.




     

    I've lived such a great, fantastic life already, but there's still so much more.

     

     

    You change for two reasons. Either you learn enough that you want to or you've been hurt enough that you have to.

     

     

    She can handle trouble and carry heavy burdens. She holds happiness, love and opinions. She smiles when she feels like screaming. She sings when she feels like crying. Cries when she’s happy, and laughs when shes afraid. Her love is unconditional. There’s only one thing wrong with her - and that is that sometimes she forgets what she is worth.


Comments (14)

  • MyUnderstandings

    Omg. Are you for real? I would honestly like to punch this guy in the face and choke him out. How dare he say that to you. Wow. People amaze me at how mean and low they can be. Screw him. He is so beneath you. You are so much better than that. One day he will realize that. Ugh. I am now angry for you lol. Grr. Anyways..besides that douche bag, I enjoyed your post <3 Rec'd

  • xl0vequ0tezx

    hey girl, first off i want to say that i have been on xanga for like 8 years now and your site is one of my all time faves! i love every single one of your posts. i am so so so sorry for what you're going through. i went through something similar five or so years ago. i wish i could tell you it gets better, but i still struggle with the demons in my past every day. you seem like such a strong girl though (stronger than me, that's for sure!) so i hope that you take a little time to be sad, but then move on to the bigger and better things that await you. keep your head up! :)

  • hopee89

    you're better than that. <3

  • amyha819

    He's the loser for leading you on. If he had the confidence to be alone, he wouldn't have to lead you on and beat your self esteem down to feel mighty. Just because he can berate you doesn't mean that it's true. His opinion isn't worthy. He's the insecure and worthless one.

  • Dreariexxmeepers
    Wow I am truely sorry! He does not sound like the nicest! Just dont worry your pretty little mind about him one day he will regret this and you can tell him to shove it. You can do so much better if you need anyone to talk to you have all of us(: hope it works out
  • saskane

    I am awfully sorry for you and can't imagine what you must be going through - At least you know where you stand and in a sense its easier to move on if someone is horrible to you - because their behaviour makes you realise you are better off without them.


    Im struggling at the moment with a relationship too - this guy I was seeing who I really liked has gone to germany for 3 months and despite buying me flowers and cooking me dinner and being a true gentleman the night before he left he still said he didn't want to be with me whilst he was away. So you see Im left in this mad limbo of do I move on or do I hang on until september? Its better to know where you stand my lovely.
    Love the blog by the way - you are beautiful. xxx
  • Mellaanie

    I know exactly how you feel and I m so so sorry...forget him he is so not worth it!!! I loved your post!!

  • FindingTheRealMe23

    A guy like that is the one whose worthless not you!! Any person that can treat someone like that has way more effed up than you'll ever think that you are!! Don't let anyone tear you down! Keep your head up! Everything will sort itself out and things will get better...and just remember don't let the guys of the past get the best of your future I let mine go a long time ago granted took me awhile to realize it but I'm better because I did!!

  • BiteYourTonguexxx

    Are you kidding me? I don't understand how another person could be so heartless. People never cease to amaze me! I know there isn't anything I could say to make you feel better, but I mean, at least you know now. You don't have to wonder if there could still be a chance. At least now you know He isn't worth YOUR time. One day karma will catch up to him. One day he's going to get hurt just like he hurt you. And you're going to find an amazing guy who actually loves you.


    And an amazing post my dear! Of course rec'd.
  • ohbabyitsana

    This was an amazing post, very touching.

  • g0ldandcocaine

    Here's to new beginnings, excellent post!

  • hopeless_romantic95

    I haven't been on for a while so I totally missed the Ryan thing. I'm sorry hun, guys seem to always say that 'everything was a lie' or 'we were nothing' I'm not gonna be one of those people who say move on or get over it. Because I've been there, alot. My boyfriend was my best friend and he said that everything was a lie, that I never meant anything to him, and that we only got together in the first place because he heard I slept around. Everyone kept telling me to get over it because he was a jerk. But when you find out all the memories you had together didn't mean anything to him it hurts. So bad. And its gonna take time to get over, its been almost a year for me and I still miss him sometimes. I didn't mean to make that so long..sorry. I guess what I'm trying to say is I kind of know how you feel, and I'm sorry. If you ever want to talk about anything you can always message me. <3

  • biddefordlove
    Wonderful post! Sorry about that ass hole! Keep your head up.
  • ViveLaMusique

    I've been where you're at, and I know it's hard. Good for you for trying to move on. I promise you it WILL get better. You're strong, we all are really, if we just give ourselves a chance. :)

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