Monday, 23 January 2012
Here's a quick post before I attempt to go to bed.
Ugh. I just need my life to be simple for just one day. Is that too much to ask?
I was watching Tuck Everlasting today... I wish there was a place that beautiful that I could escape to. It's raining where I am right now. If any of you are thinking about moving to Chicago... DON'T. The weather is the worst.
Gosh, I sound so drab. Sorry for rambling... Hope everyone had a great weekend!
"People would say "I'm single.", but well, to me, that sounds rather mean. It sounds like they were trying to say "I'm alone." or "I have nobody to love." That's not true because I have my friends, I have my family, I have my music. I would rather say "I'm free." It sounds better."
Don't envy anybody. Every person has something no one else has. Develop that one thing in yourself, and make it outstanding.
I think the problem is that I am stuck waiting for him to do something, to make a move, to say the perfect thing. And the problem is that I shouldn't be that girl, the one who sits and waits for him. I should be independent. I should think clearly and consistently without having my mind jump straight back to him. Yeah, falling for someone like that is the hardest thing to do. And the stupidest thing is that the thing standing in my way is fear of losing him, the fear of rejection, the fear that I might lose a friend that means everything to me. I want to be everything to him, but I'm not. I'm not the kind of girl he needs, and I'll never be that girl.
Hearts will never be practical until they can be made unbreakable.
-The Wizard of Oz
Do you ever think sometimes that we gave up too fast?
I was never one to patiently pick up broken fragments and glue them together again and tell myself that the mended whole was as good as new. What is broken is broken, and I’d rather remember it as it was at its best than mend it and see the broken pieces as long as I lived.
I’ve been giving up on people too easily. If they don’t call, if they don’t try - then I don’t. It’s not fair to lay the blame on them when I’m not calling either. I’m just as much at fault. I’ve got a lot of resentment for old friends - for letting me go without a fight. I just want someone to call and say, ‘I miss you, how are you?’ I just want to call someone and say, ‘I miss you, I’m sorry.’ I want to be brave enough to stay in one place.
You're only as strong as the tables you dance on, the drinks you mix, and the friends you roll with.
Sometimes the person you want the most is the one you're best without.
It is my responsiblity as your best friend to make sure you go do exciting things, even when you don't want to.
When asked, I say that I am completely over you. And, for the most part, I am over you. But there are always these little moments, these random memories, buried conversations that sneak out at me and take me by surprise. And, without realizing I’m doing it, I’m missing you. So much that my heart aches. But as soon as these flashbacks fade away again, I’m okay. But I’m scared. I want to leave you in the past but it’s hard to do when you’re always there, hiding, waiting for the opportunity to drag me back. Because honestly, if you called and apologized right now, I wouldn’t hesitate to take you back.
Do you ever wonder if we make the moments in our lives, or if the moments in our lives make us?
-One Tree Hill